Tuesday, October 27, 2009


Having just returned from yet another funeral, I'm forced to reflect ,
once again on the meaning of life...
The point of it all.
I know , deep in my heart, that God directs
and has plans for our lives...
but in the face of death,
 I am forced to evaluate LIFE.
Not only mine but those of the people I love.
The ones I see day to day...the tired,struggling, lonely ones.
The forgotten and troubled ones.
The ones who endure emotional pain, physical difficulty, loss  and abuse.

As I sat in this funeral I saw the generations of friends that have and are even now suffering these things.
It seemed  my heart would  burst from the pain of it all.
How could just this small group represent so much suffering and sadness?

This world has become so troublesome and sad at times.
Oh, I have hope- eternal peace and even joy.....
but the pain of this world is real
and if nothing else would make me seek God
and the promise of life eternal,
this pain and sadness would drive me to seek HIM.

I don't have any wise words or a big lesson~
just a heart full of mercy and compassion for all of those who are suffering.
I'm so glad that God has me in the palm of His hand-
He shelters me from the raging storm that is this world and the pain within it.
Ps 61:3
For thou hast been a shelter for me,
and a strong tower from the enemy.
Ps 62:7
In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God.

***If you saw me today and thought me unfriendly, you were right.
I wasn't fit to be around people-
In a day or so I'll feel a bit more like it but it sure seems to linger longer the older I get.
It just seems that I have so much to "think-out" and I can't think and function at the same time....:)
so, until a brighter day......

One of the songs that was played has been a favorite of mine for years-
it's called "PRESS ON" by Selah~
it wasn't avaialble to play here but I did put a couple by them that are dear to me as well.


Dawn Dutton said...

Dear Autumn, I am sorry to hear of your sadness and loss. Death will come to us all and we all realize this but do find it hard to understand and accept. I like the way you wrote your blog today. It speaks to me and is exactly how I feel at times. I just need alone time to sort things out... Hard for me to explain but you just said it how I feel it ... (I hope that makes sense) Thanks...
prayers for your well being... Dawn

cinnamongirl said...

Hugs and it is very understandable that you need time.

Autumn said...

Yep- Dawn- it makes sense.Thank you!

Carrie- tks to you also!

Ya know the funny thing is that the sweet lady that passed on was the mom of a good friend- not someone I was terribly close to.
But it evokes the same feelings any more! Weird huh?

Ruth said...

Hugs to you Autumn! It is so hard sometimes to just live the day to day and go through the pain in this world. God is so good and we do have hope. We have the greatest promise from Him. What a great reminder. I always wonder how people can survive without Him. I can't imagine handling life without the Lord to turn to.